Am I missing something?

A few days back I received the following mail:


I know I shouldn’t be writing this. But just couldn’t stop from doing it. Sorry for doing it.

I was searching through net to get some ideas for the personal webpage I was planning to design for my brother. Somehow saw your webpage accidentally. I read your story from there.

Just wanted to say, U still miss something. And that’s the intimate relationship with God. That’s the best achievement that u can ever have.

I was hoping while reading your story that u might have learned something from that accident. That how precious your life is before God. It’s easy to say “I wish I were dead.”

Even I have thought about it many times when I go through physical or emotional pain. But there is something beyond this life and that’s eternity.

Where will be your place in eternity? With Jesus or in Hell? Find that out from the bible.

U mentioned u like reading. Start reading the bible. Your eyes will be opened to the amazing word of truth. I wish u all the best.

Once again I apologize for doing this, if I hurt u by anyways.

God Bless You.


I was shocked and surprised when I read the mail—a ‘you are doomed’ mail without any provocation. At first I thought of ignoring the mail, but the mail really annoyed me. How can a person who doesn’t know me write such a mail. So after much thought I sent the following reply:

Hi DJ,

Thank you for your mail. It seems that you have not read the story completely. It is true that in the beginning of the story I have written “I wish I were dead”. I was referring to my state of mind during the first 15 – 20 minutes immediately after the accident. With so much pain and agony, I wished it would be better if it ended. In my opinion, that is a perfectly natural reaction of most ordinary people who are suddenly exposed to severe pain and distress.

But based on just one sentence, how can you say that I don’t have an intimate relationship with God. If you have read the article carefully, then you must have found that in at least three places I have mentioned about the way in which God has blessed me. In fact, I have ended the story with the following sentence “… When God closes all doors, He opens a window. Often we spend so much energy banging on closed doors that we forget to feel and enjoy the breeze coming through the open window…” Another example “…Another thing the incident has taught me is that how precious are the gifts that God has given us—our limbs, sensory organs, etc.,—which are usually taken for granted…” Yet another “…May be this is one way God has blessed me. By giving me a very good friend. Not all people in the world are that fortunate…”

You are asking me to read Bible. How did you get the idea that I am not reading it? Also Bible says that “don’t judge others…” But you have just done that based on a sentence that I have written some 12 years back.

I know that there is something beyond this life. I also know that there is heaven and hell. But my humble opinion is that reading Bible is not the only criteria that decide whether a person should be in heaven or hell. It is what you do in life, for others and for yourself that is more important.

Also I have a small advice. If you are sorry about something, don’t do it. If you are doing something, then don’t feel sorry about it. I didn’t have any problem in reading your mail. I respect your frankness in writing the mail and there is no need for any apologies. But I choose to disagree with what you have written.

I am person who believes in God and I do believe that he had a purpose in changing my life this way. And I don’t have any regrets. Sometimes I am sad, sometimes I feel bad. But I think that is a normal reaction.

May be I don’t have the mental strength and courage that you are blessed with. Or may be as you have mentioned I am still missing something… God only knows.

May God bless you too.

Best regards,


I am yet to receive a reply.
Was I right in sending the reply or should I have ignored the mail?
Am I missing something?
Only God knows…

P.S. In a lighter vein, after reading Silverine’s recent post PR in Heaven! I don’t have any fears of going to hell. If hell is as good as she promises, then I don’t mind going there. But if I want to go to Heaven, then I can always get a recommendation letter from Silverine, who by now is a close pal of St. Peter, and secure a place in Heaven. And I really don’t mind doing any of the jobs in the heavenly organizational hierarchy from Milk Vendor to Halo Polisher.


  1. James Bright said,

    January 4, 2006 at 9:14 pm

    Dear Alexis,

    Reading Bible everyday never makes somebody wise..! It is surely how somebody understands it or how someone is reacting with the fellow human beings, is ultimately whatever that counts. Even if someone is going to the Church or Temple very religiously and never can make himself a good person, then what is the use? If Jesus is going to come again, then He will smoke all of them out from His Church…!
    You are a ‘great example of the human hope.’ Your story is incredible and it shows how efficiently a human being can fight back his misfortune in the form of that terrible accident..!
    By sending that email, you certainly did not overreact…!
    That is my opinion my dear friend…
    Please do not feel upset..Keep doing your wonderful work…
    God bless you…

  2. silverine said,

    January 4, 2006 at 9:43 pm

    Read the mail and am amazed at the gentleman taking off tangent on a sincere statement. I dislike people who think they can cure anything from a common cold to a divorce by advising “read the Bible”. I also dislike people who seize every opportunity to advise you to read the Bible.It is so easy to advise but so difficult to to a living example of the advice. I too read the Bible everyday, but I have never advised anyone to do the same.

    Your answer was brilliant and I am not surprised that he did not respond!

    And you last comment was so hilarious lol.

    My post was a dig at the popular notion of Heaven as a place where souls live in genteel harmony. The logical conclusion to this would be that Hell is the opposite of Heaven i.e. a fun place to be.

    So lemme know when you need that Letter of recomendation. (psst ..St. Peter is partial to scotch, so bring a bottle) And after your advice on my post on catching a ‘Cold’ I will say that you will be a popular Milk Vendor with lots of heavenly inmates catching frequent bouts of cold lol

  3. nimi said,

    January 5, 2006 at 3:46 am

    Dear Alexis,

    I happened to come across your webpage on the 1st of Jan,
    Your blog made me think about life, how we take our lives for granted .Your courage , your zest for reading , your ability to
    cope with difficulties life has thrown at you make you more closer to God than any one of us.

    What do we call these bible thumping hypocrites who are not
    living in the present and think that whatever they say is the final authority on God.

    Moving on… your tales from Engg days make excellent reading.
    I look forward to reading more, your writing is inspirational and at the same time entertaining. Anyways my eight year old son is not going to Engg college in Tvm nor is he going to stay in the hostel.

    Take care

  4. Alexis Leon said,

    January 5, 2006 at 9:45 am

    James Bright, Silverine & Nimi: Thank you very much for your support. It really means a lot.

    Silverine: It is actually a lady who wrote the mail.

    Nimi: TVM Engineering college is very nice college. In my opinion the best in Kerala. So don’t deny your son the chance to learn and have fun in a wonderful place, because of my posts 🙂

  5. Geo said,

    January 5, 2006 at 6:20 pm

    I know you don’t need my advice to live your life. :_) So this is a reply to Nimi :_) Ma’am, I second Alexis in recommending CET as the best college of the state. It sure teaches you to live your life. :_))

  6. nimi said,

    January 5, 2006 at 7:30 pm

    Geo and Alexis,
    The chances of my son going to CET is remote at best as we are based in US right now, I am from Tvm and has always thought of CET as the best! But you guys have to admit that the thought of my eight year old attending the bucket parties and ‘hostel day’ gives me the chills!!!(lol)
    paranoid mom

  7. Paresh said,

    January 5, 2006 at 8:12 pm

    I’ve been in such a situation many a times… that I’ve lost count. People like the dame who proffered advice suffer from some kind of superiority complex. They think they should uplift the down trodden & heal the world. But let her experience at least 1% of what you’ve gone through and first thing she’ll wish for is death & curse the ‘God’.

    You aren’t missing anything. It is the people who don’t understand your grit & courage are surely missing a few simple lessons about Life.

  8. -poison- said,

    January 5, 2006 at 8:53 pm

    i think that your response to that doomsday mail is perfect.

    and i dont subscribe to that chap’s idea that everyone has to follow his views on religion(or anything else).

    as for me, i dont believe in any existing religion, right now.
    is there a hell or a heaven?
    even if there is, its is a black or white choice?

    frankly, i think that heaven would be a very desolate place, since the majority would probably in hell(assuming, there is a hell 🙂 )

  9. -poison- said,

    January 5, 2006 at 8:55 pm

    “Also I have a small advice. If you are sorry about something, don’t do it. If you are doing something, then don’t feel sorry about it.”

    that advice is beautifully simple, and i think that its the only thing that one needs in doing anything.

  10. anu said,

    January 8, 2006 at 9:24 pm

    i felt so indignant when i read that email.. writing something like that.. advicing to read bible and all that an ordinary person person itself is irritating.. but to write that to someone like u.. who has faced the challenges in an extraordinary manner is sheer vulgarity..
    u have shown pracicaly how a person can face life with dignity and strength.. i feel that u r simply great…

  11. Sreejith Kumar said,

    January 10, 2006 at 4:53 pm

    So surprised to see this galling mail. May be he is a Bible seller! 🙂